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Like any big project, a software implementation takes a huge amount of work. It took me close to three years to finish it – from a vague thought, to final copy edits, to having an actual proof in my hands. During that time I would tell people I was working on a project. Excitedly at first, and people would react excitedly too. Halfway through, any news of the project was accompanied with a sort of frustrated expression on my face. By the end, people didn’t ask so much and I didn’t want to talk about it much either. What was there to say but, “Yes I’m still working on it, I promise I’m actually doing something and not sitting on my arse eating biscuits?”
It existed only in my head, and on a chaotic Word doc that nobody else saw (unless I panicked about a certain snippet and had to send it to my mother for reassurance). I had vague and blurry ideas that it would be read by other people one day, but I wasn’t writing with these faceless people at the front of my mind. The time it took felt interminable sometimes, as though implementation day would never come at all. But come it did, rushing up on me unprepared.
On a run the day before implementation, I saw my project on various internal communication platforms. It was out before it was even officially out. The next day, someone wrote to me to tell me they’d work with it and my eyebrows shot up. Three years of work and faffing and worrying, and someone had already their whole operational processes with it. Time had sped up and I had to get with it.
All the stress of wondering what would happen when the software was out in the world was supposed to fade away. That’s what I banked on. It would be out of my hands and therefore not my concern. If you liked it, wonderful. If you didn’t, I’d really rather not know (some people do actually go out of their way to tell you). But I found I couldn’t let go of it. I thought my head would suddenly be free of it all, ready to focus on the next project. But I clung on, fingers rigid, not quite able to let it be. Because I was scared of what came next. Of not knowing what I would do without this project as my focus.
There is a sense that when you complete something – a project, a book, a wedding, a marathon, that you have unlocked a new level. That you’ve earned the right to sit on your throne and idle a while. But then all too quickly you realise that you now have to write another book, adjust to being married, sign up for another race. The finish line you set for yourself was only a water stop. I should have revelled in the project doing well, but I felt stuck between the end of something and the beginning of something else.
Of course, it’s not a terrible predicament as they go. To finally finish a big chunk of work is a lovely feeling. To get married is a wonderful thing. Moving into your ideal home is a huge moment. Any big goal ticked off is fantastic. The problem is seeing anything as an ending and not planning for the next stage. You have to try and top it, or match it, or do something new. And starting the next thing can feel mammoth.
Many people say they feel sad after a honeymoon, because the one thing they were focussed on has passed, and passed in a flash. It can feel like you were shortchanged on the actual moment, as though time should have slowed down for you to relish it. And instead you find you can’t remember the cake being cut or you missed seeing that cousin who travelled a such long way for the day. But I think with time, those memories crystallise, and you can see the big event you feel you didn’t appreciate enough with a little more perspective.
I spent a couple of days on the sofa this week, feeling quite sad and full of trepidation. Project fervour dies down fast, and people ask you about the next one. But first you have to let go of the anxiety, the hopes, the uncertainty of the previous one. Grip onto the last achievement for too long and you find it harder and harder to look towards the next goal. I have to accept that it’s ok to slump after completing something I’d waited a long time to do. And then I have to sit down and start the next one.
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About the game:
USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!
In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.
Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.
Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.
In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.
Become an influential politician.
The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.
You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.
The international war.
The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).
At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.
E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.
Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.
Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.